You Think You Are Dreaming Big, Dream Bigger With God

For the past 6 weeks, God has been challenging me to think larger and to dream bigger. So, I have been thinking about my future and asking myself questions like, What would I do if I had a lot of money? And If I could do anything in the world, what would I do and why? At first I felt selfish and thought that I shouldn't be thinking so lavishly. But when I asked God about it, I believe He was saying that the things I want to do are not selfish and that I was created for great things. And when I really thought about it my life would be somewhat different, but my passions for bringing people closer to God and inspiring them in truth remains the same. Maybe one day God will bless me with a platform to speak truth and inspire people much like the popular NFL player, Tim Tebow .Or maybe one day I will be working a minimum wage job with what appears to be little influence. It doesn't matter to me as long as I am being obedient to the things God is asking of me. Another things that I have been thinking about is the fact that recently people have told me that I am being a good steward of the things God has given me; which makes me think of this scripture and wonder what other things will God have me be in charge of.


“His master replied, ‘Well done, good and faithful servant! You have been faithful with a few things; I will put you in charge of many things. Come and share your master’s happiness!’ - Matthew 25:23 NIV


Again I ask myself, If I could do anything in the world, what would I do and why?


Sometimes when I begin to think of "my dream job", having a nice house with little to no bills, and having the privilege of speaking truth to thousands of people - I become awestruck thinking Really? Me? No, someone else can do a better job or communicate things better. But why not? Why not me? If that's how God will use me, then so be it. If God wants to use my life in such a enormous way, then let it be. Why should fear of failure, or fear of not communicating effectively get in the way? WHY NOT?! This makes me think of the life of Moses, who led thousands of people out of Egypt (a place filled with many lies and injustices) with a speech impediment. If God used Moses, why not use someone else like me? I don't have a speech impediment, but I do struggle when stressed or under pressure to communicate clearly. With every opposing question that comes in my mind, I realize more and more that it's only a lie. A lie to get me to not walk in the fullness of who God created me to be. However, I will not succumb to these lies. I will not settle for anything less than my best. I will live my life humbly and obediently for God and only Him, no matter how big or small the platform may be. 

AFRICA!!!!!!

I have exciting news that I am eager to share with you. I AM GOING TO AFRICA!!!!! Ever since I did my Discipleship Training School (DTS) and did my outreach phase/missions trip 4 years ago, I knew that I wanted to be a missionary. But I had no specific idea where I wanted to go, so I began asking God 3 questions: Where, What, and Why. I soon realized that I had a huge heart for Africa, specifically the Southern part of Africa. As I continued to ask God about what I was called to do in Africa he showed me that I come alive when I hear about AIDS and HIV in Africa. Then I asked the final question, “Why?” and the answer is bring faith to the faithless, hope to the hopeless, and to love the unloved – simply as Jesus did and continues to do. Then God gave me the verse 1 Corinthians 13:13, “And now these three remain: faith, hope and love. But the greatest of these is love.” I believe this dream and passion to go to Africa started when I was around the age of 8 when I watched the movie The Lion King. I know now that Africa is not like the movie, but I still get excited thinking about when I will be going there.

So you may be asking, how did you get chosen to go to Africa? Every small group leader in the DTS gets put into consideration as to who will assist the outreach leader. In the DTS that I am staffing, there are 2 outreach locations for the students to choose from. One is to China and the other is to Africa. I talked to one person responsible for choosing outreach assistants and told them that I would love to go to Africa. A couple weeks later they approached me and asked if I would like to go to Africa. I screamed and said, YES!!!!! There will be 23 students going to Africa, and for every 5 students 1 staff person needs to go. So I will be assisting the leader along with a married couple and their 2 year old son.

The next question that may have crossed your mind is, where will you be going in Africa, and what will you be doing? We will be going to Johannesburg, South Africa for 3 weeks. Then we will be going to Dondo, Mozambique for the final 4 weeks of the outreach. In South Africa we will be working in the slums and also with AIDS babies. While in Mozambique we will be working with Heidi Baker’s ministry called Iris Ministries. This specific location that we will be at is boy’s orphanage ages between 7-18years old. We will be working hard on this trip by helping with farming, plowing fields, leading church services, loving on the widows and orphans, and many other things.

There are many more details to be worked out and our plane tickets will be bought soon. The tentative dates that we will be traveling will be from March 28^th – May 7^th. After arriving back in Denver, Colorado the students will go through a week of teaching and debrief times as well. They will then graduate on May 20^th and will go back to their homes.

My current plan after the students graduate is to take a 3 week vacation where I will be spending about a week in Arvada, CO with my parents and then flying back home to Illinois with them for about 2 weeks. I’ve been wanting to spend more than a week in Illinois, because 1 week is not enough time to see family and friends. I am also hoping to share with friends, family, and supporters about specific stories and things that God did in my life during this trip. I believe that while I am in Africa God will give me answers to questions that I have been asking Him for awhile now.

I will try to send out another update before I leave for Africa.

I Don't Want To Ride On Somebody Else's Passion

I don't wanna ride on somebody else's passion

I don't wanna find that I am just dry bones

I want to burn with unquenchable fire

Deep down inside

See it coming alive

Help me find my own flame

Help me find my own fire

I want the real thing

I want your burning desire

--- song "Help Me Find My Own Flame" by Will Reagan and United Pursuit

Ever since I first heard this song a couple months ago, I've had a stirring in my heart for something more. Something much more. I believe that I have a unique calling on my life, and that my own flame is to go to South Africa and help people with Aids through health care and music. I feel a stirring in my heart to get more training, either do more YWAM school's or go back to college. I am not sure if I will become a Nurse some day or if I will just get training fit specifically for the ministry that I feel I have been specifically called to do.

As for now, I am going to be on staff with YWAM for another year and maybe even for another year after that. I am unsure what my future holds, but I know that it holds in the hands of my God.